So last week I posted an old video, from about '07 and I think it is always good to go back to put things in context.
So this post is the first of a series of posts to inform you about the old me. There will be stories, projects, and other inspirations to bring you guys closer to an understanding of the transformations and development from "Feel-X" to Brandon Feel-X Morel, and then to now being "The Symbol",
So this project was a Mix-Tape I had put out when I was 16 called ""Ya'll Know who it is! vol. 1". (So you know, there was never a vol. 2 and I don't think there ever will be. lol)
I still have about 5 copies left of this CD, which I sold on the Subway and out of my locker in High School. At the time, I think on the train most people just bought it because they saw a young kid trying to do something for himself and just supported off of the strength of that. I remember down at Times Square we were selling them, and my boy V got stopped by an undercover cop but he just let us go because we were so young. In school I think people bought it because of the hype that I was the only one doing something like this at the time. Back at St. Ray's and even when I went to In-Tech I was known as "That Rapper guy". Out of curiosity I wonder other than these 5 copies I have now, how many are floating around out there if any.
These were the early days of course. . . I wanted to be something inspiring and inspirational, but I also was from the Bronx and brought up in this egotistical culture of death. Add to that, I was a lost teen trying to find my way, leading a group of minorities from the Bronx who for the most part only knew of "Thugged Out' Hip Hop music, and had the wrong depictions of manhood depicted to them.
As I contemplate the creation of this project, I remember how some of it was recorded in my mom's bathroom where I taped up blankets on the walls to try and soundproof it and another part at a Studio in the hood where one of my homies who was a graffiti artist put me on to because his cousin ran it. His cousin was doing work with Dipset at the time, and was almost signed a few times before getting into some trouble in the streets and moved down to Florida. I remember in particular one day I was there when we were recording and someone got hit on the "Key Up" (yeah. this is back when everybody used to "Bleep" someone from that Nextel, or Boost mobile phone. lol) and was told there was beef on the block. Instantly, on of the guys went into the other room and pulled out a machete, and the other one went in one of the drawers and pulled out a gun and they all went outside except for me and one other dude. I just remember sitting there praying like "God, how did I get into a situation like this." I was never a thug, but I was around so many I tried to keep up the persona. I mean at this point I knew these dudes were drug dealers, and there was weed smoke in the studio every day, not to mention the few times I saw them bagging "that white" (if you know what I mean). This was one of the last days I was there. Soon after was when the dude running it ran out to Florida. And even when he came back over a year later he was low, and by this time I had my own studio set up at home.
These are stories not too many know . . . Not even my mom! lol. I know she would have bugged out, if she knew this is what was happening at the time but I was also just a young soul searching to be heard and due to the society I was in, I thought this is the only way it would happen.
Thank God, I lived through these experiences and changed so that I can share with you now these stories . . . Stay TOONED.
- All is Love
- The Symbol
These are my thoughts . . . My Beliefs . . . My Actions . . . Everything I do. This is the documentation of my quest towards creating more unity in the community by authentic #LOVE.
This blog was started at:
and continued at:
But now, as I have matured in my understanding as "The Symbol" and no longer Brandon Feel-X Morel you can continue my journey with me here.
(click above images to get download link)